Comments on: Raising Daughters

By: Chris Lopez

Chris Lopez — Thu, 22 Jan 2009 06:55:03 +0000

Daniel, I think you’re bang on with this post. As a dad to 4 daughters, as different as they all are, all your points apply.

I got “lucky” with my first one (who’s 10 now) in that I was able to really put my influence on her and turn her into a volleyball/soccer playing, “tell-you-what-I-think-of-you” tomboy…she is as far from being a “girly-girl” as there can be.

The other 3 are the pig-tail wearing, princess-loving, ballet dancers that like to put make-up on me while I’m sleeping.

I too am a big advocate keeping them grounded and agree with Jon (@ DadTrek), in that you are doing them a huge disservice by letting them win all the time. Build their confidence, but do so in a manner that won’t set them up for disappointment later on in life.

By: Jon @ DadTrek

Jon @ DadTrek — Tue, 20 Jan 2009 19:12:18 +0000

I especially like the last point you made, which applies to both boys and girls equally. You hit the nail on the head… we do our children a disservice if we make them think they’ll always win, they’re always special, etc. It just sets them up for failure as an adult. Thanks for the great post.

By: Raising Daughters @ Discovering Dad | New Dad Blog

Raising Daughters @ Discovering Dad | New Dad Blog — Tue, 20 Jan 2009 14:42:26 +0000

[...] up as much advice, tips and knowledge that I can from anywhere I can find it. I came across a great post at Discovering Dad on Raising Daughters. If you have or are expecting a little girl, these are some great [...]

By: Daniel

Daniel — Mon, 19 Jan 2009 23:57:20 +0000

I’m glad you all liked the post!

I think the key to my growth as a dad has been just realizing that to her and her 8-year-old size world, what shoes she gets to wear, as an example, really is a big deal.

By: Matt

Matt — Mon, 19 Jan 2009 21:42:42 +0000

Great feedback, Daniel! My daughter is almost four now, and I wonder sometimes what kind of a father I’ll be when she gets to be your daughter’s age. You know, closer to those years when all Hell breaks loose (help me!). But I think you are right, and I think that like you imply here, the trick is balance. I’m always working to balance between being a father, which for me means laying down the law and being stern with her when she needs direction, and being sensitive to the fact that she is NOT a boy. Having a close relationship with my mom has always helped. So once in a while I WILL indulge the old feminine side and simply tell her “no no no no. WHITE SHOES? Go back in there and put on the black ones. Did you even LOOK at a calendar when you put those on?”