This article written by Contributing Writer Matt Pfingsten.

I was overwhelmed with the amazing responses people shared about the article What Kind Of Dad Did You Have? So many people came forward, not just to comment, but to share real and personal experiences that they had with their own fathers. The relationships I have with my father has deteriorated to the point of non-existence, and reading some of your comments made me feel much better and more comfortable, for lack of a better term, with my situation.  You helped strengthen my resolve to be a different kind of dad to my daughter – Thank You!

So I decided to follow it up with a sequel and focus on the most obvious topic. Moms. I have gotten to know many moms through blogging and real life, but you don’t get to hear much in cyberspace from grown men talking about about our moms.

Looking back on my childhood, I was a daddy’s boy. I remember sports, carnival rides, BBQ’s, Wiffle Ball and back yard games. Of course my mom was there throughout it all, but I must have been taking cues from my dad during that time. It wasn’t until my teenage years that I began to consider my mom as the primary parent of influence in my life, and I’m thankful that she was such a good influence on me.

My mom was a terrific lady, and she remains the same today. I don’t tell her “thanks” enough. I got all of my artistic and musical abilities from her. I was encouraged to actually pursue art as a profession by her. She taught me to cook, bake, create…all the fun mom stuff. Most importantly to me, and I am guessing to my wife, I learned how to treat women with respect.

There were some rocky times when my parents were going through their divorce during which I turned to my mom more than my dad. She never waivered in her unwillingness to blame him or to put us between the two of them. She displayed a very strong character throughout the ordeal and, as a result, I began to gravitate towards her as the parent I would learn from from then on.

During those years, I became more sensitive. Seeing my mom upset from time to time about the divorce taught me how fragile a woman can be, and seeing her angry taught me how strong their will is too. She would never allow me to let a door swing shut on a woman or treat girls with any form of disrespect whatsoever.

I remember a specific instance, during the time that my grandmother was passing away in the hospital, when a young nurse came in. Probably all of 26. She was well-intentioned enough, but she kept referring to my grandmother as “hon” and “sweetie.” When she left, my mother quietly told me how she expected me to respect grandmothers and great-grandmothers, and to never condescend to them by using nicknames.

Its possible that my mom was trying to instill all the values in me that she had wished my father would have possessed, but it didn’t really matter. She was right. I see a flash of red every time I hear a guy make fun of or belittle his girlfriend or wife in public, and it bothers me when I hear about guys forgetting their wives birthday.

I have my mom to thank for all that. If she had chosen to be defeated by the circumstances in her life, or chosen not to constantly remind me how important it was to treat women with respect and class, then I probably would not have the family I have today. I am very lucky in that respect, and I owe it all to her.

I love my mom very much, and if she happens to read this article, well…I’d just like to say….”Thanks Mom!”

How does/did your mom influence your life? What traits or characteristics, if any, do you have her to thank for?

Matt Pfingsten is a Contributing Writer for Discovering Dad.  His personal site is The Playpen.  You can also connect with Matt via Twitter @mattredsparks.

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